#61

How very very complicated you are. Like a mystery. A rubik cube with 12 sides. A crossword puzzle with 2 clues. A map with no legend. But the unexplainable connection and emotion I feel for you is insane.


"To have everything and nothing." Please release me from this hell in which you've placed me. What test are you giving me because I fear that I may not pass it. The knowledge I possess doesn't begin to suffice for the amount that I need for this. "This pain will be useful to you one day." I doubt this strongly. In what way will this be beneficial? I see no end or no purpose to this. "What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger." No, what doesn't kill you leaves a horrible scar with worse memories. Tear-soaked pillows and unrelenting terrible nightmares. Jumps at mere touches, mere expressions of emotions. How in anyway is that making one stronger? And if it just gets worse, what is to become of me? An emotionless shell of a person where a soul, where a heart use to reside? I fear this very thing.

I've possessed this body for to long. Please, may I take residence in a new domicile? I feel this one won't hold for much longer.

And the more I talk, the worse it gets.