#59

WHAT IS IT THAT YOU WANT FROM ME?!!!!!

When I tried to be there, I wasn't good enough so I stopped and now I'm at fault for it? What did you want me to do? Stick around and be MISERABLE? Because that's what it was with you. Contradictions pour from your mouth like rain from the sky during April. I don't care? Fuck you. Your feeble mind couldn't begin to understand the level of caring- scratch that, the LOVE I have for you. But that's not enough. Nothing is ever ENOUGH for you.

WHY DO I EVEN BOTHER?

It's a complicated situation. No the fuck it isn't. Why don't you just let me go? I can't let go of something that I never had to begin with. All I do is break your heart and make you cry. I'm always mad, always arguing always brushing you off. If I do all of this WHY WON'T YOU LEAVE ME ALONE? I can't give you what you want, apparently I never could and you keep wanting me to be someone I'm not. I'm sorry, I can't, no I WON'T be that for you. And you cry yourself to sleep every night because of me? Yeah? And how exactly is that my fault? Where you thinking about crying yourself to sleep when you were fucking everyone I knew? Where you thinking about that when you were lying to me to my face? How about when I kept trying to change everything about me for you? And I'm suppose to give a shit that you're crying yourself to sleep? Man, fuck you.

I do care, but I don't want the pain anymore. I don't want the arguments, I don't want the tears. I don't want to see you unhappy and no matter what you say you know we aren't going to work. I'm sorry but I'm not doing it anymore.

I'm sorry about this.